In case you missed it, a great interview on NPR’s Morning Edition this week. Seniors across the US are struggling with the same question — if I sell my house, where will I go? Click here to read the interview transcript.
(Posted with permission from Mike DeLeon at Caring Transitions)
Here are a few tips from the experts to help you create a plan that can help you manage a move for an older adult.
- Don’t make seniors feel guilty. Avoid saying things like “Why did you hold on to this for so many years?” while sorting through belongings. Statements like this can cause stress and make seniors feel like a burden.
- Save photo albums for LAST. They can surface too many memories at once, which slows the process and triggers waves of emotions.
- Set a timer. Grab a kitchen timer or your phone and set it for one hour. Take a break once that hour is up.
- Color-code with Post-It Notes. Seniors have a tough time reading small writing. Color-code with post-it notes so PINK is pack, GREEN is sell, and BLUE is give away.
- Bring a door stopper. Doors get in the way, especially for older folks. Bring door stoppers to prop doors open to allow for easy room access for Grandma, and for large boxes and furniture.
- Consider online platforms for estate sales. Most seniors are not internet savvy, but their children/grandchildren usually are. There are many online estate platforms like CTBIDS.com, that sell everything online as buyers bid. No in-person estate sales with strangers walking through the home and haggling over prices. The online estate sale platform handles it all, allowing the family to make money from hidden treasures around the home.
Best Sellers: Electronics, jewelry, collectibles, and durable medical equipment.
Items That May Not Sell Well: Large off-trend furniture, off-trend or well-worn clothes and kitchen utensils.
- Keep a schedule. Many seniors like a routine and stress if it’s altered. If the senior goes to bed at 10pm every night, don’t try to keep packing late at night.
Caring Transitions® takes steps to train and screen every employee and has developed estate sale standards that uphold the values of integrity and honesty for over 10 years. Since many of our clients are older adults, each of our offices are independently certified to support a “senior move” and help mitigate the effects of stress, health and common cognitive issues which are frequently challenges for late life relocations. In Atlanta, contact Caring Transitions’ Mike DeLeon – email@example.com.
How do you know if it’s time to have the conversation with your loved ones?
(Posted with permission of Caring Transitions of Northeast Atlanta)
As COVID restrictions begin to lift, more families have the chance to travel to see parents or aging loved ones. If you are visiting with family and notice changes in mom or dad’s health after time apart or only virtual visits, it may be time to have conversations about a healthy aging plan.
Often times family members hesitate to talk with their aging parents about common topics of concern such as changes to health, transportation, home care, legal and financial issues as well as retirement housing. These are important topics that can’t be ignored but may be uncomfortable to discuss. Despite any differences in age or understanding, on the most basic level, we all want to feel loved.
What changes may indicate additional support is needed?
- Difficulty keeping up with finances. Observe stacks of unpaid bills or late notices.
- Changes in personal hygiene or housekeeping that indicate parents are having trouble with personal grooming or housework.
- Your parent repeats themselves often in the same conversation, seems confused, highly emotional or exhibits unusual paranoia. This could be caused by medications or other more serious cognitive issues.
- Excessive shopping through TV or online outlets, or an unusual interest in online sweepstakes that require their personal information, phone numbers, addresses, social security or banking information.
- Your parent is extremely isolated due to loss of a spouse or loss of personal mobility.
- Numerous safety concerns in the home, such as heat, air conditioning, leaks, crumbling plaster, trip and fall hazards, steep stairways, loose carpeting and outdated electrical.
- Health concerns: disorganized medications, spoiled food in the home, lack of healthy food items, infestations or mold.
Don’t feel discouraged if you notice any of these changes. It is much better to have these important conversations sooner rather than later. It is often too late to make informed decisions or be sensitive to everyone’s point of view once a personal or medical crisis occurs. Decisions that could have been made in advance end up being made in a rush; resulting in regret, remorse and unnecessary expense.
How can I communicate openly in a caring and loving way?
- Be Attentive – Take the time to create a calm and quiet environment for conversation, especially important conversations. Making sure there is a reduction in distractions will help keep the conversation focused. Remember to pay close attention to what’s being said to ease tension, give comfort, and maintain trust.
- Be Understanding – There are often feelings of confusion and loss that come along with discussing changes in care or moving to a new place. Being empathetic is the first step to truly being open to what is being communicated.
- Be Aware of Body Language – Body Language communicates beyond words and surpasses the barrier of understanding. It is important to maintain eye contact, a relaxed posture, as well as smile genuinely and often. Emotions can often be “felt” through body language and nonverbal cues.
- Be Patient – Remember to take the conversation one moment at a time. This can be done by keeping the discussion simple and willingly repeating information. Allow for time to process the conversation without rushing the moment. This can help reduce anxiety and uncertainty.
- Be Calm – Your conversation may be difficult or unwelcome and this could be a source of frustration for both you and your loved ones. Maintain a calming tone and body language to keep the conversation healthy. Be sure to listen and acknowledge emotions, like fear, anger, and anguish in a loving way.
Focus on the benefits of a creating a healthy aging plan.
Difficult or complex conversations are not always easy. Oftentimes people feel it’s easy to avoid difficult communications regarding health concerns because they may not want to face the fact their parents or loved ones are getting older. They may also feel that asking too many “prying” questions could jeopardize good relationships. On the other hand, they may also wish to avoid the additional responsibilities that are sure to surface as care issues are discovered.
Prioritize taking this time to enjoy each other’s company and have caring conversations. Taking the time to visit more often isn’t always possible during these difficult and uncertain times, so make the most of the moments you have in person. Your family will benefit from increased clarity and decreased conflict as they gain a sense of comfort knowing they are respecting their parents’ decisions and values. Frequent communication promotes honest conversation and can help you adjust to the many changes that take place as parents grow older.
(Published with permission from Caring Transitions of Northeast Atlanta)
The holiday season is over and many people area are now left with a sobering realization that loved ones they hadn’t seen in more than a year need help. The warning signs that can be masked by distance like hygiene, trouble standing, and stacks of unpaid bills became obvious as families reunited with aging parents over the last few weeks.
Now adult children are left with difficult questions about what to do next. Should we move mom to a senior community? Does dad need a caregiver? Is it time to downsize to a smaller home?
#1 Is it time? The first step is to figure out if this is the right time to begin the transition to a smaller and more manageable home or assisted living. Here are a few questions you can ask:
- Did you notice a change in hygiene? Did she appear to have clean hair? Did he suddenly start growing an unkempt beard? Was there a noticeable and uncharacteristic body odor?
- Were there expired items in the refrigerator? This could mean your loved one isn’t eating enough and isn’t paying attention to basic health and safety.
- Are there stacks of unpaid bills? Stacks of unpaid bills can cause financial problems for an aging parent and are a major sign he or she can no longer keep up.
- Did your loved one struggle to get around the home? If you noticed trouble getting in or out of chairs, a slow shuffling pace or frequent stumbling, it’s time to consider a home that is more suited to a senior’s needs.
- Did you witness a lack of interest in hobbies? Maybe your mother is an avid piano player and you noticed the piano covered in dust. Perhaps your father loves to read, but you didn’t see a book by his bedside. These are signs your loved one’s zest for life is slipping.
#2 Consider your options. The second step is to research different strategies with other family members to find a good fit.
- It’s time to downsize. Your parent may not need help with daily living, but you have noticed they struggle to keep their large home clean and the grass mowed. This is a great opportunity to discuss moving to a smaller house or even a condo.
- It’s time for in-home help. Your loved one could benefit from an in-home caregiver who can assist with light housework, bathing and daily living
- A fulltime care facility is the best option. Your loved one is struggling with all aspects of life from home upkeep to bathing. It’s time to move him to a fulltime care facility.
#3 Plan a move. Moving is listed as one of the most stressful events in a person’s life and it becomes even more stressful if that person has lived in the home for decades.
- Sort first. Pack later. The hardest part of the move is taking that first step. Help your loved one sort through what to keep, donate and throw away. Each can be labeled with a simple color-coded post-It note.
- Set a manageable schedule. Don’t expect your aging parent to work on this move late into the evening hours. Try to keep as close to their normal routine as possible.
- Limit the emotion. Save photo albums for late in the process. Trips down memory lane can cause increased angst and regret about the pending move.
- Hire someone to help. Downsizing companies like Caring Transitions are specially trained to assist with these kinds of moves. Experts can help ease the stress, streamline the process and speed up the move.
If you’re looking for helping with a cleanout, downsizing, packing/unpacking or liquidating an estate, you can contact Caring Transitions’ Mike DeLeon at firstname.lastname@example.org.
Choosing the right long-term care option is an important decision many older adults face daily. If a late-life move is part of your healthy aging plan, the next step is choosing a new place and preparing for what’s next. The hardest part for many people is getting started on choosing the right residence and planning for the move.Understand Your Situation
If you are still undecided about your move that’s okay. Moving somewhere new can be a difficult decision at any age. If you are an older adult moving may have improve your quality of life, here are a few ways to tell it’s time:
- You have health complications that are not suited for the current layout of your residence
- The thought of caring for or paying for landscaping, cleaning multiple bedrooms, or other general upkeep tasks and costs seems stressful
- Moving could save you money in retirement
- Your home has lots of space that is never used
Understand Your Health
Before embarking on this journey, there are three important areas you will want to factor into any senior living decision with the support of your doctor or care team:
- Medical Concerns
- Cognitive Concerns
- Assessment of functional abilities or “Activities of Daily Living”
Understand Your Options
After gathering all the information you need about you or a loved one’s medical condition, start the selection process by making sure everyone helping you make a decision understands the difference between each senior living option. Here are simple definitions to share for some of the senior living options you and your loved ones may be considering:
- Retirement Communities: A housing option where community residence is specifically for people in a retirement age range and may include single-family homes, condos, townhomes or apartments modified for older adults needs.
- Continuing-Care Retirement Communities: A campus-like community that offers different levels of care like independent living housing, assisted living, and skilled nursing care in one location.
- Skilled Nursing: A facility that provides a wide range of health and personal care services that typically includes medical and nursing care, social and mental health care, and rehabilitation services.
- Respite Care: An assisted living or skilled nursing facility that caters to short-term medical care for older adults and others recovering from surgery or a serious illness.
- Assisted Living: A housing option that provides support for Activities of Daily Living that typically includes transportation, meals or meal preparation, housekeeping, laundry, recreational and exercise activities. In some cases, these communities will help with care tasks like bathing, washing hair, or dressing if they become harder for a resident to do on their own.
- Memory Care Facilities: A skilled nursing or assisted living community with larger staff that offers more supervision and security features designed specifically for people living with memory impairment.
Compare Your Options
Once you have a firm understanding of your options, asking the right questions can help you make an informed thoughtful decision. Use the questions below to help pinpoint what senior living option will be a good fit.
Do I have health conditions that require extensive care or minimal care?
If you or your family member has health complications that require a specific care plan or accessibility accommodations, it is important to factor this into your senior living selection process. This could be something as simple as moving to a space with a simpler layout or a wheelchair friendly entrance. Remember it’s better to understand what you need to make a decision you will enjoy.
Do I still have the ability to drive or would I prefer transportation is provided?
Driving is often associated with independence for some seniors. If you have physical limitations or take medications that make it unsafe or uncomfortable to drive, you will want to consider how that makes an impact on where you decide to live. Depending on the option you choose you will want to know the proximity to the grocery store, family members and friends, a community’s walkability, and transportation options.
Which option is the best choice for my social life?
Social interaction has been associated with health benefits like a sharper memory, increased physical and emotional health, and longevity for older adults. An integral part of quality of life is maintaining connections to those you love as well as maintaining friendships. As we age, it is easy to feel disconnected or out of touch. Strong social connections and interactions with family, neighbors, or other people you see regularly can help you or a loved one maintain quality of life while aging.
Which option best fits into my financial plan and will accommodate future changes to my health?
Being realistic about your finances and creating a budget is a great step towards planning long-term care for your future. In many cases, budgets and savings have a limit for what is covered. It is important to include the possibility of being a resident in more than one senior living facility in your healthy aging plan. Making solid financial plans or creating a new financial plan could help you decide which move is the right decision for you now and how to prepare financially for health changes that may occur in the future. The National Institute on aging has detailed information on covering the costs of long-term care, you can read about here.
Consider Hiring a Move Manager
Moving can be both a physical and psychological process. From furniture pieces and photos that hold memories, to deciding what to purge, to the labor it takes to move each item, a plan can help simplify the moving process for anyone. Once you’ve decided on the right senior living option, it may be helpful to get expertise from an expert that specializes in late-life moves. Caring Transitions has Certified Relocation & Transition Specialist with specialty training in move management, senior relocation and senior transition services ready to help you.
This article is shared with permission of Caring Transitions.
Is it time to move to a larger or smaller space? Whether choosing to move now or later, you should start asking the right questions today.
Here’s how to tell if you should move to a larger space:
- You need to make room for aging parents or relatives who cannot afford to age in place or an elder care facility
- You must make room for returning children
- Your home is overflowing with furniture and miscellaneous items that have no place to go
- You are running out of storage space
How to tell if you should move to a smaller space:
- You or your partner has health complications that are not suited for the current layout of your residence
- The thought of caring for your yard, multiple bedrooms, or general upkeep seems stressful
- Moving could save you money in retirement
- Your home has lots of space that is never used
A few other factors to consider before deciding to rightsize:
- You’ve decided to move closer to children or grandchildren to make new memories with family
- As your wants and wishes change, your neighborhood may no longer provide what you need
- Your home no longer appeals to you and you are not in the position to nor desire to remodel
- Selling your home could yield exponential financial benefits
Rightsizing can be new, exciting, and in some cases frightening. Considering the tips on this list can give you a great head start. Your next best option is to contact a Seniors Real Estate Specialist who will help you work out a plan of action and time frame best suited to your needs.
A whole bunch of fun is what we have when I get together with fellow agents to teach the 3-hour Continuing Education class called “Here Comes the Boom” and the 2-day Designation class, “Seniors Real Estate Specialist”. Both feed my passion for educating. The classes are always great learning for the participants as well as me – since teaching is always a two way street, in my opinion!
As a Real Estate Instructor, I can share information and examples from my own vast experience. However, the experiences shared by participants are most valuable to help us all learn what our clients need from us, how we can best service our clients, or pick up tips and strategies to support our real estate businesses.
I’m available to instruct real estate agents and to facilitate seminars for older adult groups open to hearing about the challenges and solutions of downsizing, resizing and relocating. Call (678) 609-8019 to discuss how we might work together.
“Best most informative class yet!” J Tow
“Hilary was awesome & also her guests – would recommend the class to anyone” T Prieto
“ Awesome class – Awesome instructor!” C Banks
“ One of the BEST classes I’ve ever taken!! I would love to work with seniors!” L Peterson
“ I felt like a sponge that couldn’t soak up all the great information that I learned. Amazing class and amazing instructor!”
“Hilary Walker and other speakers are passionate and very knowledgeable. The class was very well worth it because of this”
“Instructor very passionate & committed!”
“SRES very interesting to me now. Hilary was great – Very knowledgeable” B Clifton
“Well put together. Great Instructor”
“Excellent Presenters, Excellent Materials, Extremely Useful”
“There was a lot more information than I was expecting. Great class”
“Outstanding class. I cannot begin to tell you what I got out of this class. You definitely have challenged me”. J Lester
“Extremely wonderful presenter. Guest speakers were incredible too!”
“Great Instruction, Great Info, Enjoyed the class”
“Well informed and animated instructor – included real life examples to illustrate objectives. Well worth the investment of time & $$!”
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This specially-designated REALTOR can save the children of seniors a lot of time when their parents need to downsize
Not just limited to Conyers but all around Atlanta, many older adults who own homes eventually get to a point where their home no longer accommodates them as it was originally intended. They may no longer need the size of the home, be physically able to take care of the home or can afford the cost of maintaining the home. In too many cases, health challenges compress the time needed to plan for a housing transition, find a new home or other living arrangements and/or sell their current home.
The adult children will find there’s a plethora of resources, housing options and price points to consider, so finding a residence that is the perfect mix of warmth and proximity to health care providers and facilities while being functionally adequate for the challenges of aging means much time and effort is involved in considering all the options. Senior-specific financial and real estate considerations often must be handled by the children of seniors, while juggling their own careers and family life.
If your aging parent or other loved-one needs to downsize or find a residence better suited for them, a SRES®-designated REALTOR is best trained to handle your loved-one’s real estate needs. They can sift through the options and present them to your parents, saving you a lot of legwork and time.
Hilary Walker, a SRES®-designated REALTOR®, Broker and Director of American Realty Seniors Division, says it best:
“The challenge is that ‘many adult children of baby boomers’ rarely have the time that is needed to gather all the necessary information about the services that would be helpful to their parent. This means the parent often remains in their ‘ineffective’ situation for longer. But also, connected to this, is that often the adult child is trying to show the parent that it may be best if they no longer live in the family home that has functional issues relating to the parents’ current health conditions or lifestyle needs. The other challenge is for the adult child to find and provide solid information to parents without making the parents feel as though their child is ‘babying’ them or trying to take over. Seniors Real Estate Specialists like me can help with all of this.”
To be experienced in serving this demographic, the REALTOR® must pass the National Association of REALTORS-designed course. Earning the SRES® designation means the REALTOR® specializes in the needs of clients aged 50 and over who are buying and selling real estate.
SRES®-designated REALTORS® are knowledgeable about these things and will save you time by finding reputable services or handling them for you:
- Senior housing options and locations
- Move Management Coordinators
- Counseling strategies to help in life transition planning
- Remodel/Renovation contractors in case they wish to age in place
- Factors and trends in housing, retirement income and finance specific to those 50 and over
- Identifying and protecting seniors from finance, mortgage and loan scams that target this demographic
- Aware of Housing for Older Persons Act (HOPA), senior communities and housing restrictions
- Advisers for Home Equity Conversion Mortgages, Reverse mortgages, 401k accounts, IRAs and pensions as part of wealth management and to assist in real estate transactions
- Protecting a parent or senior loved-one from losing access to Medicaid, Medicare, VA or Social Security benefits when selling their real estate
Atlanta Seniors Real Estate Team provides holistic real estate services for the unique needs of older adults and their families. Contact a Seniors Real Estate Specialist today!
SRES® REALTORS® also have partners in the Senior Care Market who help make the transition to a new home as easy as possible for all concerned. Kaye Ginsberg, founder of Peace of Mind Transitions, a full service seniors relocation partner, explains:
“Senior Move Managers take the stress out of moving. We work together with the senior and their family to decide which belongings will go to the new home, then work with them to manage what to do with the rest (sell, donate or dispose). We coordinate packing and moving and then completely unpack the new home; including hanging pictures and making the beds.”
Ginsberg said, “The first step is for the senior to identify what they will take with them and what they would like family members to have – and that’s the hard part. This is the first time in history that we have two generations downsizing at once – and none of the “children” want any of their parents’ belongings. Which means that many items like china, crystal and silver are not holding up in value for re-sale. Perhaps it would be better to focus on what I like to call ‘Doing Good While Downsizing’. Why not donate items to a local charity who will make sure your items go to people in need who will appreciate them?”
Ginsberg says it’s good to strategize early: “It’s never too early to start thinking about the future. Even if you’re not ready to move now, it is wise to know what your home is worth and what other housing options are available for you. And it is certainly never too early to start thinking about what you want to do with your lifetime accumulation of possessions.”
National Association of REALTORS. SRES
National Association of Senior Move Managers. Your Guide to Stress-Free Rightsizing and Relocation
Photo via Pixabay by Pexels
If you or a loved one have recently been diagnosed with a visual impairment, you’re probably thinking about ways to improve and modify a living space to make a home safe and comfortable. It can be overwhelming at first, but the key is to start small and work your way up. Sit down and make a list of any daily activities and how they’ll need to change; for instance, voice software that will aid with working on a computer.
You’ll need to do your best to add up all the expenses you expect to incur. You might find that moving will end up being the best option. At least add up the potential costs of moving, and compare. It’s important to think about function and safety over anything else. Here are a few tips on how to create a safe living space that will work well for you or your loved one.
Look at your lighting
The lighting in your home is extremely important. Natural light is usually preferable to individuals who have a visual impairment, but it will be necessary to have another means of lighting dark corners, closets, stairways, and the places you spend the most time.
Be careful about lighting that creates glare as certain types of flooring can become very shiny under bright lights and might create a fall hazard.
Make important things easier to find
It will be very helpful to mark important things–such as the thermostat, the knobs on the oven, and the edges of stairs–with brightly colored tape. Color and texture are extremely useful for people living with a visual impairment, so wrapping your toothbrush with a rubber band might help you differentiate between yours and the ones belonging to your spouse or other family member.
Your home needs to be safe first and foremost, so clear out any clutter in the main living and walking areas. Don’t forget to either remove throw rugs or tack them down to the floor so the corners don’t turn up and create trip hazards.
Contrasting colors are extremely helpful for the vision impaired, so consider painting the walls behind appliances and around light switches a bright color to make things easier. This is an especially helpful tip for the bathroom, where walls and appliances are likely to be white and blend in with one another.
Organize the pantry, closets, and cupboards and use a braille label maker to make small or similar items easy to find. Group like items together in a way that will make sense to you and memorize the groupings.
Think about safety
Disabilities of any kind require a new way of thinking about safety, so it’s important to think ahead and make sure smoke detectors, carbon monoxide detectors, and fire extinguishers are in proper working order and in every room. It might also provide you with a bigger sense of safety to have a security system installed with a loud alarm.
Consider these factors and how you can either incorporate them into your current living environment. If moving might be a better option, try to see what you can find on the market that covers at least some of this. Chances are, you’ll still need to adjust, but investigate all your options, because doing so can make a huge difference when it comes to how much it’s all going to cost.
Guest writer, Jim Vogel, at Elderaction
If your senior parent or other loved-one needs to find a residence better suited for them, a SRES®-designated REALTOR is best trained to handle their real estate needs. PEMCO Realty has a team of Senior Real Estate Specialists ready to assist you or your parents to make this a smooth process.